The reason America appears this way is clearly England's fault . . .
Well, thanks for sending over the best and brightest to start the party!
Actual Puritan Names:
If-Christ-had-not-died-for-thee-thou-hadst-been-damned Barbone
son of
Praise-God Barebone
relative of
Fear-God Barebone,
Jesus-Christ-came-into-the-world-to-save Barbone,
and
Damned Barebone
Dower right wing black-clad conservative gun toting bible thumping psycho Christians . . .
with buckles on their hats.
Actual Puritan Names:
Humiliation Hyde,
father of TWO sons,
BOTH christened
Humiliation Hyde Continent Walker
They sent them over with guns and bibles and no farming implements.
England was never funner than when the Pilgrims split.
Actual Puritan Names:
Sorry-for-sin Coupard
Fly-fornication
Job-raked-out-of-the-ashes
Has-descendants
Abuse-not
Kill-sin Pimple
They still celebrate Thanksgiving in England.
Maybe we can send some gun-toting, Texas militia psychopaths back your way.
Actual Puritan Names:
Dancell Dallphebo Mark Anthony Gallery Cesar
son of
Dancell Dallphebo Mark Anthony Gallery Cesar
born 1676
Keep America conservative, white and witch-burning, as was intended.
#Trump #America #England #Funny #Thanksgiving #Immigration
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