Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Democracy Is So Overrated

I'm sure you've noticed that the perfect political storm has unleashed an abundance of "Wacko Bird" presidential hopefuls. The escalating verbal jousts and implosion of the Republican party could not present a better opportunity for commentary. However, everyday brings events more absurd than the day before and I cannot start a post while my OCD is stuck in gathering information overdrive.

Then, to justify my continued Netflix subscription, I spent a decadent 12 hours in a House of Cards binge.

Obviously the egomaniacal spewing begs for a Tump, Cruz and Underwood comparison. So while I continue to spend an unjustified amount of time in compilation of the spew, here is a bit of the fact versus fiction pileup.

"Edward R. Murrow warned us in 1964 that when news divisions decide that the news has to make money, and has to get ratings, it’s no longer news—it’s entertainment." Kevin Spacey, speaking to reporters during the season premiere at the Smithsonian's National Portrait Gallery. 

Ted Cruz was stopped at the curb and asked about House of Cards while his very irritated personal assistant or congressional staffer or public relations handler or possibly just lunch date glared from sidelines.

Cruz reported that he loves the show but clarified for anyone confused by the fictional series, "It isn't real life. There are fewer murders in real politics."

Or so Cruz would have you believe.

"okay ted, do some standing" "got it. normal human standing"

In response to an earlier season, Cruz was not happy about the antics of one of the fictional senators. The ultra-conservative, "Tea Party Bullhorn", openly clashed with party leaders, threatened government shutdown, and was in general a condescending, grand-standing ass.

Sound familiar?

Cruz responded to the doppelgänger, "In the show, the character blocks entitlement reform that would strengthen Social Security and Medicare. Listen l campaigned on entitlement reform to strengthen Soc. Sec. and Medicare, so the idea I would block that was ludicrous."

Ted, bless your little heart, you weren't being lampooned FOR your ideology. You were being lampooned for the disastrous self-promotion OF your ideology.

Perhaps your very irritated personal assistant or congressional staffer or public relations handler or possibly just lunch date can explain why you absolutely are a condescending, grand-standing ass. 

Hillary Clinton explained the seasonal fight song of every Netflix enabled, House of Cards fan.

"We’re only going to watch one episode, oh, let’s watch another. Okay, well, we have time, we’re not going anywhere, let’s watch a third." 

At a Carnegie Hall benefit, Spacey did an impression of his long-time friend, Bill Clinton, "Kevin, 99 percent of what you do on that show is real. The 1 percent you get wrong is that you could never get an education bill passed that fast."

Bill lamented not knowing earlier that per Frank Underwood, murder was well within the president's discretionary ability. "Think of all of the opportunities I missed. So little time, so many people that have it coming."

Barack Obama also wished for parts of the fictitious office, "I wish things were that ruthlessly efficient. . . . [This] guy’s getting a lot of stuff done." 

It would be fantastic if President Underwood had a little sit-down with the current immobile congressional leaders. There is no chance Mitch Mcconnell isn't free of unholy unions and having someone express the unfortunate nature of revealing such difficulties may be the incentive needed. 

The missing egomaniacal spewer is The Donald. 

Per The Google, The Donald is mute on the subject of House of Cards. Unfortunately for Spacey, the recent media blitz has not been mute and from listening to his interviews, Spacey gets a tad frustrated.

President Underwood would not debate Donald Trump. "There would be a terrible accident on the way to the debate, and it would be terrible and very sad." 

During a BBC interview, he commented that Trump wasn't even in the country, "And he STILL takes my time."

When asked who would win if they did have a debate, "Well, they're both fictional characters . . . "

My favorite is an interview with Colbert, "When I'm looking directly into that camera, I'm talking to one person and one person only — and that is Donald Trump. Now it all starts to make sense."

Why yes. Yes it does.

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