Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Is the Pope Catholic?

I’ll start this post with a little disclosure.  I grew up in the Mormon Church and even if it is not the “official” doctrine, there was contention toward the Catholics. For two patriarchal, old-rich-white-guy led, ritual founded, sexually controlling, proportionally wealthy, guilt based religions, that are both referred to as “The Church” there doesn’t seem to be much acknowledgement of common ground. At least until it came time to vote for California Prop 8.  Nothing like a little maniacal paranoia of gay rights to bring two opposing parties together. 

I’ve always thought it is “interesting”, in the socioeconomically slash group based mentality sense of “interesting”, how a little righteous indignation can lead to a whole lot of crazy.  Not to pick exclusively on the Catholic Church, because heaven knows most religious groups have done some equivalent of witch burning, holy crusading or bible thumping.  But the Catholics, for several reasons, have recently been brought into focus.

“The Pope did apologize for the Spanish Inquisition. He said it was far too inquisitive. Supposed to be the Spanish Casual Chat.” Eddie Izzard


"It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics or chemistry." H.L. Mencken

“I abjure with a sincere heart and unfeigned faith, I curse and detest the said errors and heresies, and generally all and every error and sect contrary to the Holy Catholic Church.” Galileo Galilei

“If we are going to teach creation as an alternative to evolution, then we should also teach the stork theory as an alternative to biological reproduction.”  Judith Hayes

"A man is accepted into a church for what he believes and he is turned out for what he knows." Mark Twain

“She, the Roman Church, thoroughly understands what no other Church has ever understood, how to deal with enthusiasts.” Thomas Babington Macaulay


“It’s not possible to build an ark and put two of each animal on it. How do I know? Well, you try it.” Eddie Izzard

"The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of an example."  Mark Twain

“I'm saying I can't afford to make no donations to no Catholic charities. If you need the money that bad, wire the Pope. He's got more money than God!” Archie Bunker

"I'm disappointed that my own Catholic Church has decided that capital punishment is wrong. Which is pretty hypocritical if you think about it, because they wouldn't even have a religion if it wasn't for capital punishment." Stephen Colbert

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