Monday, November 5, 2012

Mandatory Meetings of Boredom or A Congress of Baboons

I have a theory about most companies. Every once in a while, management decides to make a show of importance and posturing, much like the dominant male baboon in a congress of baboons. (Yes, a group of baboons is called a congress!) Therefore management calls a mandatory staff meeting AND requires a pre and post sign in so a brief appearance with sneaky slip out will not be adequate. Then THIS proceeds for at least half an hour longer than the scheduled event.
I would like to a moment, to ask of you, the verbatim readers, please, based on the amount of paperwork I am expected to generate, assume I am literate!
However, this is not my major gripe with most meetings. It is important, the posturing and the ability to document that vital policy was read, word for word to the employees. My gripe is with the damn question and answer period after the power point presentation. Once again, I am going on the rant against that person. You know that one person who has a lengthy and convoluted personal story on any and all subjects. “But what if the new logo has the accidental markings of the ancient Pagan god of pee, because once, when I was in ‘Nam, we were all wearing purple and then Gladys, oh boy, you should have known her . . .”
And then my head falls off and rolls on the ground. “A meeting moves at the speed of the slowest mind in the room. In other words, all but one participant will be bored, all but one mind will be underused.” – Dale Dauten.

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