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Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Judgemental


Quotes from:
Disorder In The American Courts -
Things people actually said in court


q: : now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
a: : did you actually pass the bar exam?




q: : Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
a: : Yes.
q: : Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
a: : Yes, sir.
q: : What did she say?
a: : What disco am I at?




q: : Did he kill you?

q: : Now sir, I'm sure you are an intelligent and honest man--
a: : Thank you. If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment.



q: : So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
a: : No.
q: : How can you be so sure, Doctor?
a: : Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
q: : But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
a: : It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.


Donald Trump's personal attorney, the "telegenic" one.

q: : Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?


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