Tuesday, September 8, 2015

Sit Next To Kim Davis


If you haven't been interested in Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis, I appreciate your ability to rise above the ridiculous. In a nut shell she has refused to issue same sex marriages licenses, sighting authority from God's Law to do so. The irony being God doesn't sign her paychecks and her history in matrimony is not exactly biblical. 



Don't take my word for it. The biblical authority has weighed in. 



"Get this straight: you can NOT repent of a sin you actively live. Kim must leave that man who's not her husband." An instructional tweet from our friends at the Westboro Baptist Church. 



While Kim sits her butt in jail for contempt of court, her attorney Mat Staver, (former Seventh-Day Adventist pastor and founder of Liberty Counsel) has evidently confused her with Nelson Mandela and happily discussed the miscarriage of justice.



"She’s just got this humble, gentile spirit. It is so evident from just spending a few minutes with her." Mat Staver



"She hopes that in a tolerant society, people would have the tolerance to agree to disagree. In her case, to provide an accommodation for her that would allow her to preserve her conscience and core beliefs." Mat Staver



"With every day that passes irreconcilable and irreparable harm is being done." Mat Staver (Evidently the harm includes requests for her to run for president. Pretty damaging.)



But don't despair, there is a happy outcome. A twitter account Sit Next To Kim Davis has been created by an energetic humorists. (I've made the tweets more family friendly.)



#KimDavis‪ DID GOD ORDER YOU NOT TO REFILL THE XEROX TRAY, TOO? SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO GO HOME TO OUR FIRST HUSBAND 
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



FYI #KimDavis‪ pulled this same shit when someone tried to take the Foreman Grill during the Yankee Gift Swap.
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis


@nexttokimdavis‪ Your a lazy woman who don't give a crap about society. Just want a chill job?? 
- Patricia Sullivan@Texas2Love
AND YOU DONT UNDERSTAND JOKES OR "YOU'RE" 
Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



Fun fact - ‪#KimDavis is a Democrat 
- Bethany Albertson@AlbertsonB2
Another fun fact - ‪#KimDavis ATE MY OREOS. 
Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis



Illegals get amnesty. Muslims invaders get asylum. Cross dressers get "courage" awards. Christians get jail time. 
- CDM@RWSurferGirl
AND MY OREOS. YOU KEEP FORGETTING THAT SHES AN OREO THIEF.  
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



So I guess can add ‪#ClerkingWhileChristian to the list of crimes like ‪#DrivingWhileBlack now, huh progressives? Proud?
- Annie‪@bloodless_coup
You mean ‪#NOTClerkingWhileChristian. Also ‪#StealingOreos
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



@nexttokimdavis‪ you're just a mean lady...why do you work with Kim if you don't like her? 
- stephanie@blacsmom
‪I think the person who should quit is the person who refuses to do the GODDAMN JOB. 
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis
@blacsmom‪ You do realize this is a satire account, not the actual account of the woman in that photo, yes?
- Katherine Tuck ‏‪@Katherinelorna


@nexttokimdavis‪ I feel like YOU'RE the one doing doing Gods work!
- Will Armstrong@WillArmstrongPR
SOMEONE has to do work. You know, at goddamned work. 
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



@nexttokimdavis‪ how do you even get any work done there? Just about as much work as your boss?
- SBUX75DEVILDOG@SBUX75DEVILDOG
Tough to work when ‪#KimDavis ‪@libertycounsel lawyers are stealing ALL THE STAPLES
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis
#kimdavis‪' @libertycounsel lawyers just piled ALL THE PRINTER PAPER INTO THEIR TRUNK. WTF?
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis


Be back in a bit. Todd made license plates that say "DADDYBEAR" AND We're putting them on the ‪@FoxNews van LOLOLOLOL
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis
Hey, ‪@oreillyfactor - see you at work in the morning. PARK IN THE HANDICAPPED SPOT AGAIN AND I'LL KEY YOUR VAN.
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



#kimdavis‪ stands up for truth and gets mocked and humiliated. Jesus Christ had the same problem. 
- sherada collins@sheracol
BET HE CHIPPED IN FOR BABY SHOWER PRESENTS, THOUGH
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis



Joe just asked if ‪@GovMikeHuckabee and ‪@tedcruz can come to the bbq tomorrow NO THEY CANT
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis



Davis is confined indefinitely w/out benefit of a trial, 2 a tiny cell She is a political prisoner in a spiritual war ‪#IStandWithKimDavis
- CDM‪@RWSurferGirl
And her co-workers are having the BEST LABOR DAY WEEKEND IN YEARS!!!
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis



I'm willing to marry an ‪@OtterPops to a Twinkie. As long as ‪#KimDavis is gone, theres no rules.  
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‏‪@nexttokimdavis


Does Kim's elevated holy status give her license to wear white after labor day?
- Brandis Bradley‪@BrandisBradley
Only if ‪#kimDavis finds it in the lost and found.  
- Sitnexto Kim Davis ‪@nexttokimdavis


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