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Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Hope for Parenting Teenage Children


Do you get to the point where you think a coma might be a favorable option compared your current state of consciousness? Just me? 


Rather than doing something productive like going to sleep, I irresponsibly started my youtube playlist. There are some very cute preteen and teen boys with AMAZING (yeah I put my cap lock on) voices. 


It restores a bit of my hope for parenting teenage children. The Tweets are taken from the Huffington parenting post pages because they are definitely more humorous than anything I’m coming up with in my current state of insomnia. 


It always takes my son 20 minutes to find his shoes. Cause they're not on the tv, in his video game, that he won't shut off.

I don't care what my children grow up to be so long as they grow up to be not living in this house at age 32.


Warning: I just became drunk w/ power & pulled the ultimate dad move: I turned off the internet b/c my son wouldn’t brush his teeth.

I know exactly how President Obama feels. Every time my kids are forced to listen to me, they make angry Republican faces.


Every time we take our dog to obedience school I can't help but think about everything that we did wrong when we were training our kids.

I'm chaperoning a 13-hour middle school chorus field trip today... because I have a flexible work schedule and I hate myself.


DAY 2: I've offered a $5 reward to whichever of the kids comes up with the remote. So, it's come to this.

This morning I held a 2 min fam mtg with a demonstration entitled: How to Change a Roll of Toilet Paper. They were in awe of how easy it is.


"We only had 5 channels and no remote" is the new "I walked uphill both ways, barefoot to school when I was a kid."

Parenting is basically just listening to yourself talk because nobody else is.




My kids are having a calm, quiet conversation in the other room. They must be plotting my murder.


Getting into a subway car packed with 90 screaming YMCA kids is the absolute best form of birth control.


As a parent I have to ask myself tough questions. "Do I give him too many limits?" "Is he respectful?" "Am I using enough hashtags?"

I'm think these parents did something right.

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