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Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Who doesn’t love a good pat down?

Some comments on the beloved TSA

 
 
Posted on an employment web site: “Does anyone know what the requirements are for being an TSA agent?” “Based on my observations, a GED, a bad attitude and a desire to grope strangers.”  Before you get all judgmental, consider that for some of us a good security pat down is more action then we’ve seen in the past three years.
 
 
 
Perhaps a mutually beneficial arrangement where those wishing to get groped could be issued an unlimited security pass and those wishing to grope could have it. 




Recently in the news:  A TSA agent found an abandoned pepper spray canister and wanted to determine if it was real. The incident led to five fellow employees going to the hospital.



Now some things are beginning to make sense. The reason for restricted items must be to keep dangerous bits and pieces out of TSA hands.   
 


From the TSA website:


 
Traveler Information, Food and Gifts: Items that you should put in your checked bag include cranberry sauce, gravy and maple syrup.  Pies and Cakes are allowed. (It appears that Thanksgiving is a heavy bring-your-cuisine type of holiday.)

 

All food must go through the x-ray machine. Food must be wrapped in a container.  They illustrate this point with a mound of French fries on a cafeteria tray.  This is a problem? I’m sure some people are coordinated enough to tote a bag, present ID and ticket while balancing a Thanksgiving turkey on a serving platter.  I am not one of them.

 
In addition, the policy doesn’t appear to be working well.  There was the recent cupcake confiscation (That frosting is a gel dammit!) and the breast milk debacle. (A TSA agent tried to force the breastfeeding mom to take a sip out the bottle. Ick!)

 
 
Prohibited Items. “Sharp objects like an ice axe.” Good call.  Also no “cattle prods, hand grenades or vehicle air bags.” What? Has anyone, ever, wanted to bring vehicle air bags on a flight? And, if they did, it would just illustrate foresight and planning? You never know when you have to deploy an airbag.

 
 
There was a recent proposed policy change which would allow knives, with a blade up to 2.36 inches long. Per the policy, the TSA screeners would have a mandatory 15 minutes of new training and would not be required to carry a ruler. I’m guessing it may be a little difficult, even for the newly trained experts, to judge 2.36 inches (evidently the length of a non-threatening blade) versus 2.38 inches (clearly a lethal weapon.)



Well as long as my taxes are being used wisely.

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