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Saturday, May 25, 2013

The Militant Baker


I assume most everyone has heard the Abercrombie & Fitch marketing plan. If not, imagine if Paris Hilton (the quintessential example of what is wrong with America) was cloned and the Paris Hilton Coven formulated a marketing strategy that mirrored the social constrains of a Junior High cafeteria.

 

Michael Jefferies, CEO responding to the question why he will not offer women’s sizes beyond a large.



“In every school there are the cool and popular kids and there are there the not-so-cool kids. We go after the cool kids. We go after the attractive All-American kid with a great attitude and a lot of friends. A lot of people don’t belong in our clothes and they can’t belong. Are we exclusionary? Absolutely.



That’s why we hire good-looking people in our stores. Because good looking people attract other good-looking people and we want to market to cool, good looking people.  We don’t market to anyone other than that.”  

 

I made a few attempts at penning a response, something sarcastic but with a little insight. 



I think the transcendent goal of humanity is not the ostentatious consumptions of products.  If I remember correctly, it involves aspects of don't be an exclusionist asshole.
or   
 
 
I believe you are missing an enormous marketing opportunity.  Acquire a group of third world children.  This shouldn’t be too difficult considering that you product is made by these type of children. Pick the least attractive kids, perhaps a few with a deformity of some kind.  Then you could use them as props in your store. They could wear little signs saying, “Celebrate that you are better than me by purchasing a new summer wardrobe.”



However, I'm walking that thin line between sarcasm and righteous indignation so I'm turning it over to the “Militant Baker” blog.

 
 
 
The only thing you've done through your comments (about thin being beautiful and only offering XL and XXL in your stores for men) is reinforce the unoriginal concept that fat women are social failures, valueless, and undesirable.

 


Well, actually, that's not all you have done. You have also created an incredible opportunity for social change.

 
I've enclosed some images for your consideration. Please let me know what you think.

 
My hope is that the combination of these contrasting bodies will someday be as ubiquitous as the socially accepted ideal.

 
Ever so sincerely,
Jes



P.S. If you would like to offer me a "substantial amount" to stop wearing your brand so my association won't "cause significant damage to your image", don't hesitate to email me. I respect you as a business man, and my agent and I would be happy to contribute in furthering your established success.

 

P.P.S. You should know your Large t-shirt comfortably fits a size 22You might want to work on that.
http://www.themilitantbaker.com/

1 comment :

Anonymous said...

Ha! I think the CEO was the total nerd in school and is trying so hard to cover it up! I wonder what type of kids he has. I am sure they are taught some wonderful values at home.
Pick on the nerdy kid.
Never talk to any kid that is having a hard time.
Always be the bully.
Make fun of the kids that shop at Target.
Always exclude the kid you don't like and make sure they know they will always be losers.