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Saturday, March 23, 2013


The house that I am currently renting, I guess it would be more accurate to say, the house that I am currently squatting in, is a cookie cutter stucco built around 2000. So I am perplexed by the lighting fixtures supplied by the builder.

These babies are vintage 1970’s brass and cut glass beauties with coordinating Hollywood bars in the bathrooms. This leads me to guess that 30 years ago, the builder’s Uncle got his hands on a smuggled shipment of hanging lamps and wall sconces that he squirreled away, knowing they would come in handy someday.

To make things even more fun, in the kitchen there is a strip of tract lighting, unreachable by normal ladder height. The patio and garage are serviced by florescent strips which, at this point, flicker in a grand mal seizure before bravely winking out.

So we are talking at least six different types of light bulbs required to properly illuminate this abode in palatial style. Sadly, the kitchen track lighting gave the ghost a few weeks ago. Since the only conceivable time I would find myself in the kitchen is if I were sleepwalking, I haven’t been motivated to construct some method of changing the bulbs. Plus the fridge light works so what more do I really need?

Walking into the house yesterday, the kid flicked on the over the table, hanging light. There was an enormous pop, a flash of light and then complete death of the fixture.

This leaves me with a question.  Either attempt to problem solve the lighting issues in the area of the house I don’t frequent or move. Since the fire alarm I haven’t already dismantled is bringing to chirp, I guess move it is!    

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