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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

A Liquid Diet

Here is a little mathematical formula I’ve found useful:

(Depression x Insomnia) Situatonal Stress + One Fifth of Smirnoff
Obsessive Compulsive Behavior

= A Big Hot Mess

A simplified version is also as available:

Me + One Fifth of Smirnoff = A Big Hot Mess

Since I’m stuck with most of the factors on the far left side of the equation, the only way to alter the outcome is to remove the other variable.

“I drink to make other people more interesting.” ― Ernest Heminwy 

“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.” David Auerbach

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” ― Benjamin Franklin

“Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.” ― Drew Carey

“Drinking just to get drunk is like having sex just to get pregnant.” ― Robert Hess 

“You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.” - Dean Martin


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